I've had a lot on my heart and in my head these days. I am so thankful that today marks the start of a new month- November! Can you believe how time flies? It seriously feels like I was planning for the wedding just yesterday.
As we start into this new month of Thankgiving, I feel the need to remind myself of how blessed I truly am. These days I have been so selfish and continually looking towards the "next big thing" without truly living in the present and rejoicing in each day. I'm going to be honest, until these past few months, I really had it easy. Everything was so comfortable surrounded by my friends while I was in college, close to home, sure of the most immediate next steps... graduation, marriage, the move, and my first "big girl job". It was all so exciting! But even then, I was still living for the next thing.
I've always been "real" on my blog, but I think in order for this "30 Days of Thanks" challenge to really mean to y'all what it means to me, you really need to know what's going on. Days are really hard. I love marriage, and my husband has been so wonderful and supportive in this tough personal transition period. But some days I am really lonely. Some days I wonder if I'll ever move on from here to start a career I love. If I'll find friends here. Some days I just question God. "Why Raleigh?" "Why Martha?" "Why this rejection?" Not good, my friends.
This month, I want to embrace the many blessings the Lord has given me. God hasn't guaranteed everything is going to be easy, and it is this hardship and struggle and hurt that draw us closer towards him. For that I am SO thankful. Which is why I am moved to share with you each day of the month of one thing I am thankful for.
This is a pretty big challenge for me, but I want to make sure I am accountable and blogging each day on what I am grateful for. These can be big, obvious things or small silly things that give me a little joy and make my day a bit better. Right now I'm reading Ann Voskamp's "One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are" and it is incredible. This is where I'm drawing my inspiration for this month's blog challenge:
"'How,' Ann wondered, 'do we find joy in the midst of deadlines, debt, drama, and daily duties? What does the Christ-life really look like when your days are gritty, long-- and sometimes even dark? How is God even there?'"
Wow. This month I seek gratitude and an open, thankful heart. Join me in a similar challenge, if you are so moved to! I would love nothing more. God is good. He is present. I am thankful!